


A Moment of Weakness

by RosieRaven



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-25
Updated: 2013-08-25
Packaged: 2017-12-24 14:12:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/940923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RosieRaven/pseuds/RosieRaven
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Going to bed with Eren dredges up memories Jean had wanted to stay buried. Jean/Eren with past Jean/Marco.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Moment of Weakness

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place a couple years down the road from where cannon is currently. This is a story about Jean being well... on the bottom for the first time since Marco passed. Feelings ensue. I originally prompted this on the Kink Meme but then I ended up filling my own prompt. Hope this is enjoyed.

To be honest, Jean wasn’t quite sure how he and Eren had arrived at this point. An innuendo about his big mouth, a hand brushing a thigh under the table, Jaeger actually laughing at one of his jokes. A series of small occurrences that, after years of hostility, had lead to their tongues tangling in a back hallway of the Scouting Legion’s headquarters. _With all the snow piled up outside it’s not like we have anything more productive to do._

Jean could feel stubble against his lips as he moved his mouth down Eren’s cheek and across his neck. The shorter man pushed him back against the wall and he could feel the cold stone against his back. Jean’s hand slid down Eren’s back to wrap around his waist. Eren sighed, his hot breath on Jean’s ear as he rolled his hips with a soft groan and Jean could feel him pressed against his thigh.

“Do you maybe want to move this to my room?” he panted as he pulled his mouth away from Jaeger’s neck.

Eren grabbed him by the elbow and pulled him up the stairs. The moment they were inside Jean’s room with the door safely locked, Jaeger was on him again. Eren was all eager heat - his hands moving restlessly from Jean’s hips to his shoulders - never pausing in any one place for long. Jean broke away from him long enough to light the lamp on his desk so they didn’t crash into anything in the darkness of his room.

Jean stripped his jacket down his arms before pushing Eren’s off of his shoulders. He loosened the buckle across Eren’s chest. When the strap was undone and his arm bands were loosened, Jean shoved them down and then pulled Eren’s shirt up over his head. Eren had always been thin, but his body was covered in lean muscle. Jean helped undo his own harness as Eren maneuvered him back toward the bed. Jean sat as he felt the back of his legs find the mattress. Eren stood between his thighs and ungracefully tugged Jean’s shirt up and over his head.

“It has buttons idiot,” he grumbled as the shirt got stuck around his shoulders. Eren grumbled with impatience as they both struggled to get Jean’s shirt out of the way. As soon as the shirt was over his head, Eren’s mouth was back on his - the rough pressure of his lips and teeth shot a bolt of warmth down Jean’s body to his groin. Jean grunted in surprise as Eren removed his lips and pushed him down onto his back.

Both of Eren’s hands attacked Jean’s belt and his mouth moved hastily down his neck and chest to his abdomen. His breath quickened as Eren knelt between his legs, yanking off one of  
Jean’s boots and then the other. Jean would have laughed at the haphazard way Eren undid buckles and loosened straps trying to get his pants off if he hadn’t been so horny. “Jaeger - what the fuck.”

“If you want to get laid you better shut your fucking mouth," Eren growled. Eren made a satisfied sound in his throat as he finally managed to tug Jeans tangled straps, pants, and underwear down Jean’s legs and onto the floor in a heap.

Time seemed to slow down as Eren bent his head and his lips wrapped around him. Jean propped himself up on his elbows to watch and moaned. “Shit - you don’t waste time do you?”  
Eren hummed in response and Jean’s hands fisted in the sheets. He struggled not to seize a handful of Eren’s hair and just use his mouth until he finished. He closed his eyes and tossed his head back. 

Jean made a strangled noise in his throat as he suddenly felt a slick finger press against his ass. His eyes snapped open and he immediately craned his head up to look. Eren was looking at him - one of his thick eyebrows arched up questioningly.

He moved his mouth away, “You okay with this?”

“Mmhm,” he nodded slightly. “It’s just... been a while since anybody went in there.” Jean whispered with a laugh that he hoped didn’t sound as forced as it was.

He gasped and sank back against the mattress as one of Eren’s fingers slipped in. _Come on, relax_. He drew in a deep breath, trying to ignore the fluttering in his stomach. Then Eren’s mouth was back on him and that was _definitely_ better. He screwed his eyes shut and his toes curled as a second finger made it’s way in.

“ _Fuck_ Jean,” he felt Eren’s mouth move to his inner thigh, licking and sucking the sensitive skin there. Jean felt his breath come and go faster as Jaeger purposefully moved his slim fingers. _Shit he wants to fuck me_. He tried to calm himself; it wasn’t like it was the first time he had been fucked. _No, that happened a long time ago_. Those memories felt like they had happened to someone else.

He sighed in relief as the fingers withdrew, but now Eren was on his feet - poking around in Jean’s nightstand without permission. He was too nervous to be angry as Jaeger found the lubricant he kept there. Eren managed to get out of his pants and kicked off his harness. He climbed eagerly into the bed and Jean pulled him in for a kiss.

He felt Eren’s body press between his legs and he bit his own bottom lip hard to smother the whimper he felt rising in his throat. _I waited too long - I should just get it over with now._

Eren sank into him and Jean screwed his eyes shut and turned his head to the side. He could feel Eren’s mouth on his neck and hear his sigh of pleasure. Jean’s fingers dug into his shoulders hard and he gasped raggedly. _Oh God._

When he closed his eyes there was another face, another pair of arms around him, and clear dark eyes. The memory of ragged whispers in the darkness. _I’ll never want anyone else - only you. You’re mine. I love you._

It was all wrong. His stomach was twisted in a knot and the back of his throat felt hollow like he was going to be sick. 

Eren had stopped.“Jean - are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” he tried to say but he could feel the tears threatening to spill at any moment and show what a liar he was.

“Did I hurt you...” 

“No. It’s fine,” he said gruffly, “it’s just... _been_ a while.”

The relief must have shown on his face as Eren withdrew from him. Eren’s brown knitted together in confusion for a moment before his mouth fell open and he shook his head.

“You - but. No... no you’ve been with other people since then- since _him_ -I _know_ you have...” 

“I _know_ ,” Jean said, anger starting to creep into his voice, “but we - I didn’t let them... _fuck_!”

Eren looked at him in disbelief. “Jean... God dammit.” He started to pull away but Jean’s arms tightened around his back. “ _Don’t_ ,” was all he could say.

Jean was disgusted with himself - this was his weakness to deal with and no one else’s. Yet here he was - clinging to Eren like a child. His emotions, usually kept sharply in check by his will, were running loosed and he couldn’t seem to pull them back in again. It had been years now - _It shouldn’t feel like this anymore_. He was surprised when a hand cupped the back of his head and an arm pulled tight around his shoulders.

“Shit, I shouldn’t make you -”

Eren hushed him, “Don’t _think_. It’s fine.”

Jean let out a shaky breath and let himself go.

He must have fallen asleep at some point. It couldn’t have been for too long - the lamp on his desk was still burning. Their limbs were tangled together and Eren must have pulled up the blankets to keep out the cold. With a groan he unthinkingly rolled his aroused body against the other man in bed beside him. 

He froze as the memories of what had happened earlier that night came flowing back. Eren groaned however, and his hands slid down to his hips and rolled them both over. They started to move slowly at first, rubbing against one another in a way that made Jean groan and bury his face in Eren’s neck. 

“Please,” he whispered.

“Alright, but you need to be _here_... with _me_. Got it? Look at me,” he said firmly. Eren’s forehead was pressed against his and he couldn’t avoid looking into his eyes - eyes that were somewhere between blue and green and full of determination.

Eren pressed his hips forward and started to move. Jean groaned, his fingers pressing down Eren’s back to his hips. His breathing grew faster as he felt the pressure in his lower body start to build. “Eren,” the name fell from his lips in a whisper. Eren moaned and his fingers dug more tightly into Jean’s hips. Their lips met, this time with slow steady pressure as Eren began to move faster. Jean started to writhe under him as his desire rushed back, whining incoherently - the bed squeaking under them rhythmically at the force of their hips.

“Are you close?”

All Jean could do was nod and let a high pitched whine escape his throat - words were beyond him. Eren arched his back and shuddered - his fingernails digging into Jean’s skin as he found release. His hand, damp with sweat, grasped Jean and he skillfully moved his fingers - bringing him over the edge as well.

Jean was too exhausted to think. _That’s probably a good thing_. He felt cool air wash over him as Eren rolled to the side and got out of bed. He had stayed longer than Jean deserved and he couldn’t really blame him for going now. _It’s a miracle he stayed as long as he did._

He flailed, startled, as something wet and cold landed on his chest. Eren was standing by his wash basin using a damp cloth like the one he had just thrown to clean himself up. Jean quickly used it to wipe himself off before flinging it away onto the floor.

He was even more surprised when Eren blew out the lamp and padded back to the bed, grumbling at him to move over. 

“If you think I’m running back to my room to sleep you are going to be diss-a-fucking-pointed. It’s cold as fuck,” Eren grumbled pulling the blanket up and over both of them.

“Just shut up and go to sleep Jaeger." Jean tried to recall when the last time he’s actually let someone spend the night with him was. He was too tired to remember just now. 

And so, for the second time in a long time, Jean was lulled to sleep by the soft breathing of another person sleeping beside him.


End file.
